There is sometimes a loneliness that goes with motherhood. Until I became a mother I really didn’t understand this. I didn’t understand the shift that I would experience going from a coupled adult to a mother. Now I know. I am still surprised though at the moments when motherhood feels most lonely.
All this down time has given me the opportunity to catch up on one of my favorite (slightly guilty) pleasures – Jane the Virgin. ***Spoiler Alert *** Season 2 starts with Jane’s transition into motherhood. Though her situation is as dramatic as the best daytime soap opera, there is still some realistic plot around the postpartum experience.
Congratulations you have just birthed your baby. I know that you’ve been hearing that a lot lately, and you may not feel like there’s anything to celebrate right now. You are wounded, tired, and overwhelmed. You are in shock about the reality of what having a new baby is like. It’s not what you thought it would be like. This baby needs you all the time. You knew that would be the case, but you didn’t KNOW.
Time is really flying now as I am 37 weeks pregnant. Our second child could join us at any time. People often ask me if I am ready and my response always starts with a pause. I feel so much more ready to have this baby than I was to have the first, although I thought I was ready to have her. At the same time I know what is behind door number two. I know it will be several months of having a baby attached to me for the better part of most days. I know it will probably be a year of frustration with how infants sleep (even though I know not to expect her to sleep like a grownup). I know it will be a series of moments in which I think about all the things I should get done and feel frustrated that I can’t seem to get anything done.Yes, I know what having a newborn is like, but what I don’t know is what having a newborn and a toddler is like.